A Moral Quandary

Before I tell you my moral dilemma I need to explain that current day Alaska is practically the wild west. The majority of industries here are male-dominated, ( i.e. Lumber, Fishing, Mining ) so women are not in abundance around here. Many parts of the state are still developing, and living is expensive. It is just not economical for many women to move here. Every summer, thousands of men come looking for work and go back once the season is over. What can I tell you? They need women.

For those who stay, the following scenario seems completely normal.

My brother was telling me a story about our co-worker. It goes like this: Martin is a highly skilled worker. For a long time, his life wasn’t going the way he wanted it. He would hardly show up to work, be late, or leave early.

Some time ago, he started seeing someone. The girl is in the Philippines, she is young and beautiful. Martin is neither of those. He sends her money every once in a while. About once a month she will tell him a story about how she can’t afford food or to pay her bills. In many of the situations, she gets mugged on her way to the store. He feels bad every time this happens and sends her more money. He is mad, mad in love. He is much happier with a girlfriend, and that reflects on his job performance. One day, Martin tells her he wants to visit her. The calls stop. He tries to get in touch with her every way he can but finds a dead end. I don’t have to tell you what happens next. He went back to black. It was as if a switch had been turned off and all of a sudden everything was taken away from him.

Soon after that, he found a new girlfriend, also in the Philippines and is much happier now.

My brother said I should tell him that his girlfriend is a scam. Here is what I asked myself. Is it my responsibility to tell him? Or is it anyone’s responsibility to tell him? If the illusion of having a beautiful foreign girlfriend makes him so happy, why should I take that away from him?

I will not tell him anything. I cannot decide to take his happiness away. Who even says that he would believe what I was saying is true? Deep down he might know that it is not true but it gives him comfort to believe that it is real. Most importantly though, I don’t know that their relationship is not real.


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